Keeping A Secret
by calma-llama
Summary: Nagisa pays a visit to Rei after a long night of drinking and tears.


It was nearly four in the morning and Rei, for the life of him, just could not sleep. He felt stupid admitting it, but it was incredibly strange knowing that a certain blonde was not sleeping in his own bed in the next neighborhood over. He rolled over onto his side, staring absently at the blurred wall, narrowing his eyes so that he could make out the details. It was too dark to see anything and he was much too lazy to reach out for his glasses. He wondered what Nagisa was doing. He probably didn't want to know. Nagisa had been invited to a party by...Damn, he couldn't even remember her name. That girl Nagisa has been dating. They'd only been seeing each other for a little over a month and already Nagisa was spending nearly every minute at her side. Rei couldn't help but ponder the thought of the blonde quitting swimming. It was the only time of day where he wasn't glued to that girl. What if he decided to move in with her? What would happen to their team? What would happen to their friendship?

Sure, Rei knew he was getting ahead of himself. They were just third years anyway. But, this was _Nagisa Hazuki_ he was talking about. Making brash decisions and coming up with the most ridiculous ideas were his specialty.

He rolled back onto his stomach, frustrated with himself. He was seventeen years old, the top of his junior class...He should be able to go to sleep without worrying about his best friend. And yet that reasoning did not stop him from feeling extremely lonely knowing that his classmate was off who knows where partying. They'd grown so close over the last three years...Rei could barely remember life before the bright eyed blonde came whirling in.

He was yanked from his thoughts by a loud knock on the front door. Had his parents come back from their vacation early? Or maybe it was Nagisa. What the hell would he be doing here at this hour? Well, he could have had a fight with what's her name. Frankly, he was disgusted by his excitement at the idea.

He slid out from under the covers and turned the lights on, blindly searching for his glasses on the nightstand. He picked up a pair of sweats and pulled them over his boxers. The knocking came faster and even more powerful than before. "Ugh, I'll be there in a moment." He muttered under his breath, his tone practically dripping with irritation. He hurried to the front door, flicking on the light switches as he went. When he finally swung the door open, he was greeted by the sight of Nagisa half slumped over, leaning against a pretty brunette girl. It wasn't what's her name, Rei was pretty sure, he'd met her once and this girl looked nothing like her.

"Um..." Rei adjusted his glasses, making sure he wasn't seeing things.

"I found your drunk friend here wailing on the curb near my house." The girl explained. "He said he needed some help finding his way home."

Rei would've made it clear that Nagisa didn't live here if it wasn't for that fact that it was way too early in the morning for this shit and that the blonde looked pretty smashed. So, he saved her the trouble.

The brunette paused, looking around. "This is the right house...Right?"

"Yeah, he's mine." Rei responded, rolling his eyes.

"H-Hey Rei-chan." Nagisa murmured feebly, swaying on his feet.

It looked like the poor girl was about to fall over with all of his weight on her. "So, are you guys-?"

"No, we're classmates." Rei cut her off simply. "Thank you for the help." He reached into Nagisa's pocket and pulled out his wallet, fishing out a twenty dollar bill. "Here, take this. I'm sure he'd want you to have it if he were coherent enough to manage."

"No problem." She replied, taking the bill from him. "Drunk classmate delivery service...I guess that's me." She smirked at Rei and gently pushed Nagisa toward him, turning around and walking back to her car.

Rei sighed and put his arm around the blonde's shoulders, holding him steady as he led him inside. His breath reeked of alcohol.

"God, Nagisa...Where you drinking?" Rei asked, more concerned than annoyed. "We're still three years under the legal drinking age."

"Can't you keep a secret?" The blonde mumbled in response. Of course, he was wearing that trademark grin of his.

Rei rolled his eyes. "Well, come on." He spoke gently. There was no point in scolding him now, mostly because he wasn't going to remember any of this in the morning. "Let's get you cleaned up and put you to bed."

Nagisa nodded weakly.

In the bathroom, Rei filled a glass of water and opened up a new toothbrush. "Here." He said, handing it over to Nagisa. He obediently brushed his teeth, replacing the alcohol stench with a minty one. When he was done, Rei held out the water. Nagisa swallowed in slow, small sips.

"Feel better now?" The blue haired teen questioned. Nagisa shrugged. His eyes were still red and puffy from the crying the girl had informed Rei about. His hair was disheveled and his outfit had stains everywhere.

"Are you going to tell me what happened?"

"She broke up with me." Nagisa said simply. The despair in his voice made Rei feel ashamed of his earlier thoughts. Seeing the blonde like this made his heart ache.

"Why'd she do that?" He asked, attempting to sound as sympathetic as possible.

"She...She wanted me to quit the swim team. S-She said I don't spend enough time with her." Nagisa said, wiping his eyes with the back of his hands. Rei thought this was completely idiotic considering swim practice is only three hours at most while Nagisa spent the other twenty one hours with what's her name, but he decided not to say anything. "I told her that you guys were important to me too, but she didn't understand..."

He was crying again. Not _wailing _as that girl described it, but it was more of a quiet whimpering. Nevertheless, Rei couldn't help the fact that it pulled at his heartstrings. He pulled Nagisa into a hug and the blonde buried his face in the crook of Rei's neck. His skin was hot and feverish. Rei stroked his hair, murmuring _it will be alright_ or _don't worry_ and even _I understand_. Pretty much anything he could muster up that he thought would comfort the blonde. For a brief moment, he was sure he felt Nagisa's lips brush against his neck, sending odd shivers racing up and down his spine. But they were gone as soon as he convinced himself that he was just imagining things.

Finally, Nagisa's tears subsided and his erratic breathing slowed. "Come on." Rei whispered, his voice soft and gentle. "You can sleep in my room tonight." The blue haired teen was thankful that Nagisa had decided to get completely wasted the week Rei's parents were on vacation. It would've been pretty tough to explain why a drunk classmate had ended up in his bed.

All that aside, he pulled away from Nagisa, wrapping an arm around his waist to steady him. They stumbled their way down the hall, stopping every few steps for Nagisa to regain his balance. After what seemed like an hour, Rei pushed open the door to his room. The blonde was barely conscious, grasping onto Rei for dear life. He could practically feel his nails sinking into his skin.

"We're almost there...Just a few more steps, I promise." Rei urged, shuffling forward.

"I-I'm going to...Pass out." Nagisa managed to stutter out.

"Wait-" Was all Rei could respond with, wrapping his arms around the blonde just as Nagisa's legs buckled beneath him. The blue haired teen faltered, adjusting to the extra weight. "Wait!" He growled more forcibly, practically dragging Nagisa over to the bed. During their first year of high school, Rei had towered over him. But now, they were about the same height. And Rei cursed this fact beneath his breath. He laid him down as gently as possible, pulling the sheets to the blonde's chest and turning out the lights. As he turned to leave, resigning himself to the living room couch, Nagisa called for him.

"Rei-chan!" Rei turned and looked back at him, adjusting his glasses. He could literally feel his heart hurting in his chest just hearing the panicked tone of the blonde's voice.

"I thought you passed out." He answered.

"No...Okay, maybe..." Nagisa tried to sit up, but failed miserably, his arms giving out and with a small cry, he fell back against the pillows. "My head is killing me." He whined.

As much as Rei wanted to point out that was the hangover taking course, he decided against it. "Are you going to be alright? I could go get you some medication-"

"Stay." Nagisa interrupted softly.

Rei froze in the doorway for a moment, hesitant. "Excuse me?"

"Stay." Nagisa repeated. "Please."

Every single thing in his body was telling him _no_, but all that came out of his mouth was _fine_. He couldn't believe himself. "Fine. Just let me get a shirt on first, I'm not sleeping next to you half naked."

"_Naked_." Nagisa giggled in that bubbly way of his.

"Grow up. I'm going to make sure you never drink again." Rei grumbled, grabbing one of his shirts from a drawer and pulling it on. He climbed in beside Nagisa, fully dressed. He noticed that Nagisa was still wearing his sneakers and jacket, both of which smelled disgusting. A mix of alcohol and vomit, Rei guessed. He'd have to get his covers washed in the morning.

"Hold on." He murmured as Nagisa tried to snuggle up against him. "You're still wearing your outdoor stuff." He pulled the blanket back and untied Nagisa's shoes, sliding them off and tossing them to the floor. Rei began unzipping Nagisa's hoodie, becoming frustrated with the constant jamming of the zipper.

"You're undressing me." Nagisa pointed out, his speech slurred and his laughing even louder than before.

"No, I'm not." Rei explained exasperatedly. "I'm trying to get you into bed so you can shut up, go to sleep and sober up. What the hell were you even thinking? Coming to my house this late drowning in your own tears and as smashed as ever...Another one of your amazing ideas, huh?" His frustrations spilled from his lips, unable to catch the words before they escaped. He regretted them almost instantly.

Nagisa's eyes began to water and his entire body began to tremble as a new wave of tears approached.

"Nagisa, I'm sorry. It's just that...It's been a long night." He explained. But it was much too late. The blonde was crying again, fresh tears dripping from his eyes. He let out a quiet, gasping sob.

"I'm sorry." Rei whispered desperately. He finally managed to remove Nagisa's hoodie and dropped it onto the floor beside his discarded shoes. He pulled the blonde close, allowing him to sob softly into his chest. After several minutes, there was silence. Rei held him tight, not wanting to let go until he was absolutely sure that Nagisa was okay.

"You know, I'm the one that broke up with her." Nagisa's voice was muffled, but it was enough to break the silence.

Rei pulled away just enough to examine the blonde closely. "You broke up with her? But, you said-"

"I know, I know. She was the one that actually ended things, but I told her I couldn't be with her if she wanted to separate me from you guys. I told her that I like swimming with Mako-chan, Haru-chan and even Rin-chan. But, I love swimming with you, Rei-chan. And I wasn't going to let her take that away from me. It wouldn't feel right to not be swimming with you everyday...I love it too much to give it up, Rei."

Rei could feel his heart climb its way into his throat. "Nagisa." It was all he could manage without choking on his words.

"Rei." Nagisa repeated. He looked indecisive for a split second and then...He moved forward ever so slightly.

Before Rei could even comprehend what was happening, Nagisa was kissing him. The blonde's lips were pressed to his and he could practically taste the alcohol. Thoughts raced through his head at top speed. _Nagisa is kissing me. I want Nagisa to kiss me. I want to kiss Nagisa. I've always wanted this._

The realization hit him so hard that for a second he was completely motionless. Then he kissed back, so enthusiastically that Nagisa actually moaned in surprise. The blonde ran his fingers through Rei's already messy hair, pulling him deeper into the kiss. _This is a mistake. He's drunk, he'll find out tomorrow and won't ever want to be your friend again._ But, even this could not stop him from sliding his hands under Nagisa's shirt, feeling the warm skin at his fingertips.

"Rei." Nagisa murmured between kisses. "I-I...I" He paused before kissing him again. "I-"

"Yes?" Rei urged, wanting to know what was on his mind.

"I...Um, uh..." Nagisa's voice trailed off. His hands slipped from Rei's hair and his body relaxed against the pillow, asleep at last.

Rei sat up beside him and watched as he sleep, his heart pounding as his exhilaration turned to doubt. What if Nagisa woke up the next morning and decided that kissing his classmate and team member was a terrible mistake. Or, even worse, what if he didn't even remember it at all? Rei wasn't sure if he'd ever be able to act normal around the blonde with that secret hanging over his head. And there was no way he could just forget all of it happening. He stared at Nagisa. Even passed out and disheveled, he couldn't deny that he was attracted to him. How was he supposed to hide that for the rest of his life?

"_Can't you keep a secret?_" The words Nagisa had spoken earlier echoed in his head.

Would he have to live with this secret _forever_?

Oh no.

He turned over onto his side, facing away from Nagisa. By the time he fell into an uneasy sleep, the sun was already beginning to rise.


End file.
